What Experience? We Have None [Deluxe Edition]

by The BJ Experience

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  • Streaming + Download

    Immediate download of the exclusive deluxe edition of Oh No! Not Another BJ Experience Album 20-track album in your choice of 320k mp3, FLAC, or just about any other format you could possibly desire. Includes bonus digital booklet and music videos.

      $5.55 USD  or more

     

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about

The second full-length came along in early 2001. After 5x5, the band disbanded for a little bit, reconfigured in various unstable configurations, and in fact, this album was recorded with the help of many friends because of the instability. The results, however, do not show any sign of this and feature the bands unique social attack and satire as well as some excellent musicality. Unfortunately, the strong effort did not strike a hard chord with the fans; partly due to the bands inability to properly promote the record as well as inability to recreate their studio sound live. Another set back was the release date, originally slated for March, but not officially released until May 5th 2001.

This deluxe edition was beautiful remastered in 2011 and features live bonus tracks and studio out-takes.

credits

released May 5, 2001

Produced by Roger Houdaille & The BJ Experience.

Recorded on the Dippy Records Mobile Studio - February-March 2001. Mixed and mastered by Roger Houdaille March 2001.

Personnel
BJ: Vocals & Hidden Drums
Father Bloopy: Guitars, Bass, Piano, Sleigh Bells, Vocals
Tropical Barber: Drums, Guitars, Vocals
featuring
New Guy: Guitar
Frank Daddy: Trumpet, Organ
Shalom: Backing Vocals
Lex 7: Backing Vocals
also with
The Refugee: Latin Percussion
A Lo: Violin
Carrot Cake: Classical Guitar
Churro Distance: Backing Vocals
Ghetto Girl: Flute

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

The BJ Experience Miami Beach, Florida

Quite possibly one of the best bands to emerge out of the 41st Street area in the early 2000's.

contact / help

Contact The BJ Experience

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Track Name: Love@Aol.com
You wake up in the morning and you run to your computer
Go through the personals and try to pick a winner
But you can't believe it's already time for dinner
Oh well! You can't leave, you're just gonna have to get thinner

Chorus:
It's Love@Aol, it's got you under it's spell
It's Love@Aol, and you can't leave your Dell
It's Love@Aol, you might learn how to spell
It's Love@Aol, where there is no hell

You don't have any real friends and you don't care to
Just as long as you can send an e-mail or two
You don't want to eat or drink You don't even care if you turn into a sheep
Just as long as you go to Love@Aol.com
Track Name: The Luck Of Me
I called you with my cell phone
While you where giving some other guy a bone
I'm so sick of being alone
Just another night to moan

I better go take out a loan
'Cuz you stole everything I own
And everything I've ever known
You even stole my cell phone

Chorus: That's the luck of me, I guess I'll never get lucky
That's the luck of me, promises never kept
That's the luck of me, I guess I'm just a duckie
That's the luck of me, I haven't even slept
Just as I thought I recovered
My girl, she came over Just to tell me she found another
Oh yeah, she was doing my drummer

Chorus

I lie in bed just thinking of you and you're pretty face
When I'm with you I feel so... so in place
All the pictures on my table they take up, so much space
Baby why did ya have to spray me with that can of mase?

Chorus (2x)
Track Name: No One Ever Calls Me On My Cell Phone
No one ever calls me on my cell phone

No one ever wants to call me, they don't call me on my cell phone

I've got 500 minutes- 502 minutes
but no one even wants to use one minute on my cell phone
Why does anybody wanna call me?
Is it my phone voice? I don't know
I don't know, is it because I talk like this?
Because I'm all muffled
Is that it? Why doesn't anybody wanna call me on my cell phone

I call Father Bloopy but Father Bloopy just hangs up on me
he says "I don't have time to talk to you man, bye!"
hangs up on me

I call Tropical Barber
but Tropical Barber is always gotta go smoke something
so he never has time to talk to me on my cell phone

I call the backup singers
but the backup singers say this: "Oh like, I gotta go do my hair right so call me later, ok? Bye!"

Y'know? So who else do I call?
I call the AOL Movie Phone and 949 Zeta Concert Line
Yup, I call computers on my cell phone
Because computer will talk to me
Computers understand me, that's what I have to do

I can't call people, cuz people they just tell me I gotta go man, I'll call you later OK, bye!
Why doesn't anybody wanna talk to me on my cell phone?
I just don't get it, y'know I'm a nice guy
I try to be funny on the cell phone
I try to tell jokes to them when they talk to me but then they hang up on me...why!
My cell phone never rings
and if it does ring it's like the wrong number or something y'know
Like this morning, at 5:30 this morning, I was still sleeping still
and someone called me asking for room service
They thought I was a hotel, can you believe that? It's true
They thought I was a hotel!
what's that!?
Oh my god, I think my phone is ringing
Hey, I think my phone is ringing

Hello...this is BJ. You wanna talk to who? Jeff?! There is no Jeff here. This is BJ. Oh you got the wrong number? Will you talk to me anyways though? No? OK bye.
You see! It was the wrong number.
No one ever wants to talk to me on my cell phone.
Track Name: I've Got Rights Too
Just let me wear what I wanna wear
Do what I wanna do
Say what I wanna say
'Cuz I got rights too!
And so do you!
Track Name: Old Girl In The Park
Old girl in the park, why are you there?
You've got more stains on your lips then they kids do on their underwear
Hey! Don't touch that kid there!
It's not funny 'cuz they're not aware that you wanna take them into your van and play with them bare
You tell them that you care when all that you want is a 12-year old to help you make a baby- if he dare
It's a shame- the kids
They have no choice but to stare
While you prepare to get bare and dig down your underwear
It's pretty sick if you think about it
But it's gotta be sicker to be there, in your underwear
For the 12-year old kid that dares
Someone should tell the mayor if they gotta pair
What you plan to do to those kids and their underwear
It's just not fair!
That you wanna tear into those so rare kids
It's just not fair!
That you know, you wanna tear into them when they're so damn rare
Doesn't anyone care? Does anyone care anymore?
Hey old girl in the park, by the way how old are you? 55!
That's definitely not fair
Old girl in the park, why are you there?

Want a 12 year old to help you make a baby if he dare
Old girl in the park, talk to me
Tell me what's on your mind old girl in the park

OG: Well, i'm just trying to meet new people. And I want someone young, someone fresh to help me make my baby

BJ: But old girl you're 55

OG: I know I'm 55 you don't have to tell me that again. I know that, Ok? I'm going to be 56 next week. But I'm still able to have a baby. And I want that twelve year old over there to help me have a baby.

BJ: Matt...come here Matt, your 12 years old. What do you think about her wanting you to help her concieve a baby

MATT: Well, I'm only 12. Am I old enough to make a baby?

BJ: I don't know Matt. I don't know, but you're going to find out because you're going to help her make one.

OG: Yes Matt, let's go into my van right now and you'll take off all your clothes and we're going to make babies, OK Matt?

MATT: OK old girl in park, if you say so. But I really don't know if it's such a good idea. I have to be home by six.

OG: Be home by six? Matt, I'm going to have you home by midnight cuz I'm gonna make you...whoooo!

MATT: What does that mean old girl in the park?

OG: Matt, you'll find out.

BJ: It's a very twisted story about an old girl in the park. And I just can't believe that someone can actually come up with something like that: Old girl in the park. She should leave the park. She's too old. Someone should tell the mayor...that...that guy was right. Someone should tell the mayor if they gotta pair. You know what, I'm going to tell the mayor. I'm going to the mayor's office right now. Bye.
Track Name: All These Bands
Chorus:
All these bands
All these bands
All These Bands
All these bands talkin' their crap
Listen to all these bands running their mouth
Listen to all these bands trying to play rap
Listen to all these bands callin' themselves Ralph

Listen to all these bands trying to lay the smack
Listen to all these bands headin' down South
Listen to all these bands look at them hack
Listen to all these bands -- I don't think I wanna

Chorus

Now you're in a band talkin' your crap
Now you're in a band runnin' your mouth
Now you're in a band trying to play rap
Now you're in a band calling yourself Ralph

Now you're in a band tryin' to lay the smack
Now you're in a band headin' down South
Now you're in a band what do you lack?
Now you're in a band -- basically you suck!

Chorus

Listen to all these bands talkin' their crap
Listen to all these bands running their mouth
Listen to all these bands trying to play rap
Listen to all these bands headin' down South

All these bands
All these bands look at them hack
All these bands I don't think I wanna
All these bands basically you suck

Now you're in a band talkin' your crap
Now you're in a band runnin' your mouth
Now you're in a band tryin to play rap
Now you're in a band what do you lack?
Now you're in a band basically you suck
Track Name: Put Your Pants Back On
Put your pants back on!
Please, I see brown spots!
Oh my g*d, put your pants back on!
Track Name: Said I Loved You...But I Lied
You are the candle love's the flame
A fire that burns through the wind and rain
Shine your lights on this heart of mine
Till the end of time
You came to me like the dawn through the night
Just shining like the sun
Out of my dreams and in to my life
You are the one you are the one.

Said I loved you But I lied
Cause this is more than love I feel inside
Said I loved you but I was wrong
Cause love can never ever feel so strong.

Said I loved you but I lied.

With all my soul I've tried in vain
How can mere words my heart explain
This tastes of heaven so deep so true
That I've found in you

So many reasons in so many ways
My life has just begun
Need you forever that I need you to stay
You are the one you are the one

Said I loved you but I lied
Cause this is more than love I feel inside
Said I loved you but I was wrong
Cause love can never ever feel so strong.

Said I loved you but I lied

You came to me like the dawn through the night
Just shining like the sun
Out of my dreams and into my life
You are the one you are the one

Said I loved you but I lied
Cause this is more than love I feel inside
Said I loved you but I was wrong
Cause love can never ever feel so strong

Said I loved you, cause this is more than love I feel inside

Said I loved you, But I lied
Track Name: Things That Make My Ass Itch
Chorus:
Things that make my ass itch

Standing in line at the drug store, that makes my ass itch
Listening to that hardcore, that makes my ass itch
Falling asleep on the dirty floor, that makes my ass itch
Getting hit on the head by the car door, that makes my ass itch

Chorus

Giving a bum money and him asking for more, that makes my ass itch
Being so damn poor, that makes my ass itch
Getting called out to the war, that makes my ass itch
Finding out my girlfriend's a little whore, that makes my ass itch

Chorus

Getting harrased by the MickeyD's bum, that makes my ass itch
Carrying a big keyboard up and down the stairs, that makes my ass itch
Having to go pee in the middle of my show, that makes my ass itch
Getting stopped every morning by the security guard, that makes my ass itch

These are all... Chorus (2x)
Track Name: I Saw A Tay On You
Not for me to say but when I saw your face today
I saw something strange, unnormal, something which I'd rather not say
O.K. fine! I'll tell you but you have to promise not to slap me around this place

I saw a Tay on you, a Tay on you, I'm telling you
I saw a Tay on you, a Tay on you, Tay on you

Now you're gonna wanna hit me
But our deal was set, you made your bet you did!

You had a Tay on you, a Tay on you, I'm telling you
You had a Tay on you, a Tay on you, no foolin' you
I saw a Tay on you, a Tay on you, I'm telling you
I saw a Tay on you, a Tay on you, Tay on you
Track Name: Switch Your Personality
LEX 7: What the hell is your problem! Don't you listen when Roger gives you cue? See BJ this is what I'm talking bout!

BJ: Whoa! In case you're forgetting this is the BJ Experience. You don't tell me what to do.

LEX 7: Excuse me, why would you have a band if you don't want anybody to participate. I mean, in your life is it me, me, me, me, me, me cuz that's what it seems like to me!

BJ: Basically yes...that's the way it's always been in my life. Especially when I'm recording an album and I want it to be right and you're singing the wrong damn stuff!

LEX 7: Well I freakin' quit! So you can be a BJ no band having guys sittin in the corner, with a microphone, with a hat in front of them- having to ask for money when they sing

BJ: Quit? Quit! You can take Shalom, you can take Tropical Barber, Frank Daddy, it don't matter to me.

LEX 7: Kiss my ass BJ!

BJ: I don't wanna kiss your ass it's too damn big!

LEX 7: Bitch! You and your---you're lucky you have us! You're lucky you have me, Shalom, freakin' Tropical Barber, Roger, anybody whose willing to go to your damn show. That's right, kiss it!

You're so confusing to me
One minute your nice the next your mean
I don't wanna take it no more
It's time for us to settle the score

Just yesterday you were so nice to me
But now I think you hate me
Why? Because of him, because of me
Because I picked you up at 12 passed 3 and now you're late!

Chorus:
You've got to switch your personality
I don't know what's wrong with you
'Cuz the things you do are so damn rude
You've got to switch your personality
Because the things you do are so damn rude
You've got to switch your personality

You never wanna hang out with me
You always have something better to do
You only call me when it's time to whine
You never have anything to say that's new

What are you jealous?
So what if I hang out with all the fellas
I love them and they love me
I'm just helping to spread out a world of peace
What's wrong with that?

CHORUS

You have a new guy at every one of my show
You thought that I'd never know
All the lies that you've told to me
Can't you see that the only one that would be there for you will be me!

Bro, I love you man
I wouldn't do anything to hurt you
But if you can't ?? with me
Then I'll juts have to let it be

CHORUS

I wish you could understand the things that you do
And that I'll always always care about you
The love I have for you is something I can't hide
I just wanna stop fighting with you

I love you BJ
And if it's quite alright I need you BJ
To all the lonely nights
Let me love you BJ, let me love you

CHORUS